What's Your Number?

In a culture where hook ups and one night stands are things that are discussed in casual conversation, there appears to be something in the back of a lot of people's mind.


No, not the one to your phone; your Myspace or Facebook will do just fine thank you. You can keep the social security one too; there's more interest in what's in your pants than what's in your bank account.

What people
really seem to want to know is how many people you've slept with.

There's a lot to this
number. Apparently, you can use it as a way to determine someone's character, music tastes and future earning potential. You have to be careful with it too and cultivate it appropriately; those new to the game of sex can find themselves on the outside looking in. Like a job, initial experience can be hard to get (if you're male anyway) but is usually necessary to get the very good ones.

Unlike work however, your sexual experience can do more harm than good. To some people,
more doesn't necessarily mean better. They believe those who've had a number of sexual partners beyond the arbitrary ideal number, regardless of whether they've conducted themselves safely and reasonably, clearly have some unresolved intimacy issues.

Words like
slut or manwhore are often ascribed to those who enjoy sex outside of committed (don't forget heterosexual) relationships. Because anyone who chooses not to be in that sort of relationship at any given point of their lives without forgoing their sexual impulses should have a derogatory noun attached to them.

With that said, guard your
number carefully... because there's a lot more riding on it than you think.

~ Alex Rose


Simple Laws of Supply & Demand: the Exploitation of Teenagers Edition...

I saw the greatest thing on an episode of 'Shear Genius' recently. For the 'short cut challenge,' the contestants had to style the hair of little girls. One of them, a precocious, blonde haired, blue eyed wonder who will probably be on the Disney Channel in a few years, cited Paris Hilton as a hero of hers.

Now... I know some people will read this and consider it an official sign of our impending apocalypse but I think the next Dakota Fanning is on the right track. Ms. Hilton once was paid one hundred thousand dollars to make an appearance at a nightclub for thirty minutes. Maybe I'm lacking in the morality department but if I'm making that kind of scratch for doing some shit I'd do anyway, I'd be flashing my pussy to the world to stay relevant too.

I thought about that little girl on Shear Genius after reading
this article. The author was ranting about pop culture's fascination with and sexualization of teenage girls and how this terrible, terrible fixation simply has to end.

To be fair, the author presents some valid points. General consensus is paedophilia isn't cool and the media attention given to celebrities five years my junior (or really celebrities in general, regardless of age) borders on exploitative. Unfortunately, for the author and the number of people who will undoubtedly agree with her, is that the laws of supply and demand are as old as civilization itself.

Ask Vanity Fair how many copies of that 'bare shoulders seen round the world' editorial with Miley Cyrus were sold after people started raising hell about it. Ask Perez Hilton who many hits he gets on his website every month. When we wonder why paparazzi tactics amount to stalking (i.e. those pics of Miley in her under things were only seen because someone hacked into her phone) remember that supermarket rags will pay obscene amounts of money to the victor who gets the best (see: anything embarassing and/or scandalous) photo. Then remember the millions of consumers who will buy People magazine so they can see the newest members of the Benetton Jolie-Pitt family.

Our society at large has created a hydra that has successfully permeated large swaths of our culture... fantastic luck in trying to stop it.

~ Alex Rose


Irony, Sex and American Politics Presents: the Failed 'Sin' Tax...

Is there anything more ironic than American politics? We watched (mostly Republican) congressmen shake heads and wag fingers when slick Willie got blown in the Oval Office by an intern. He would later be impeached for this transgression because trying to take the edge off of arguably the hardest job in the world is the same as attempting to break into the Democratic National Committee headquarters.

The irony comes in the years following Clinton's impeachment when the twenty-four hour news cycle starts unearthing secrets that would make some politicians look like they would be more at home with Britney Spears and Lindsey Lohan on the cover of US Weekly.

We had a governor of New Jersey who came out of the closet and then resigned his position... because you
obviously can't be gay and run a state at the same time. Next up, a Republican congressman from Florida (a crusader against child exploitation of course) who offered to give private ethics lessons to teenage boys on AIM. Another Republican congressman who wanted to get his glory hole on in a Minneapolis airport, only the officer in the stall next to him wasn't really feeling that... he was promptly arrested.

This year has unearthed even more sins of the flesh and to the delight of Reagan fans everywhere it involved a representatives from the Democratic party. Bad ass, former New York Attorney General who pushed his prosecutorial authority to the limit to huff, puff and blow the houses down of executives during all of those Accounting scandals, got busted for his penchant for thousand dollar an hour 'escorts.'

And then there's the pretty boy John Edwards who has had the great pleasure of getting the Bill Clinton treatment from the media over recent weeks. I know, he cheated on his wife who may have been battling cancer and it might be his baby but still... cut the guy some slack.

Regardless though, of the the multitude of sins committed by themselves or their peers, our leaders continue to give the American public advice (and by that I mean maintaining archaic laws or enacting newer, even more ridiculous ones) on what we should (abstaining from sex) or shouldn't (watching porn, fucking someone of your gender) be doing. Honestly, at this point that's like a mother telling her children not to do drugs while she's taking bumps of blow and watching Grey's Anatomy.

Offset the harms that opponents claim the [adult] industry creates, including "numerous health, safety and societal problems, including reducing property values in affected neighborhoods and encouraging unsafe sex and aggressive attitudes toward women." Excerpted from here.

That's the intended purpose, according to Democratic Assemblymen Charles Calderon of a recently proposed bill in California. Thankfully, it died in committee but had it been enacted, this 'sin' tax (which already exists for other enjoyable things like alcohol and cigarettes) would have imposed a twenty-five percent excise tax on adult products and productions. It also would have applied to businesses who sell sexually explicit materials (that means newsstands and gas stations that sell skin mags) and websites.

Some opponents of the bill felt, "the government shouldn't be involved with people's sex lives." There's a part of me that guesses all of those shamed politicians who are now out of public office couldn't agree more.

~ Alex Rose


Public Service Announcement...

Kids... I want to share an important announcement with you courtesy of our exiting president George W. Bush. You, along with myself have been terribly mislead by 'conventional' wisdom, the American Medical Association and even our nation's pregnancy 'experts,' the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. Those crazy doctors with their years of newfangled medical research says that pregnancy beings at implantation.

Well, those 'doctors' don't know what the hell they are talking about but our President and his base (the religious right) sure do. That's why, the Department of Health and Human Services released a proposal (technically it was leaked so we're really not supposed to know about it) that allows any federal grant recipients (i.e. federal clinics and health centers) to obstruct a woman's access to contraception.

The importance of this proposal kids is that you and the rest of us misinformed Americans know the truth... that contraceptives like the pill, the patch and that God awful 'emergency' contraceptive those so called intelligent liberals allow to be sold at drug stores is considered 'abortion.' And as you've learned in all of those abstinence only classes you've taken kids... abortion is very, very wrong.

All right... I can't keep a straight face anymore. For more information on this proposal click here.

And for all of you protesters out there, go here where you can sign the petition from MoveOn.org

~ Alex Rose